Marble Hornets/Tothearks (YouTube series) -review by Ashley Sinderella

 

Greetings Ghoulies! Have I got a treat for you! This undead lady has stumbled across a unique and wonderful new web series that will drive you mad with intrigue! This web series can be found on youtube.com. Despite it’s extremely low budget it has such a charm it will have you binge watching for hours! I have not finished this series because it is an ongoing series. Believe me you’ll want to get in on this gem right away as they are eighty plus episodes deep not including the Totheark videos.

How to start:

Start watching this series by searching Marble Hornets, go to their you tube and find the first video. I suggest pulling up a new tab and looking up Totheark and opening their you tube page. Make sure to keep up with the posting dates. Marble Hornets is about a young man named Jay who is trying to uncover the mystery of his friend Tim’s unfinished student film Marble Hornets. He soon discovers a world of terror tape by tape. A few months after the original post Totheark starts posting response videos that you will need to read the comments below to decode. Tothearks videos are what really spooks the fuck out of you as you because by this point you know who the ghoulish monster stalking the men is. Believe me you will not be let down, nor will you have seen it coming!

Yes it is low budget but I have never seen anything like this before, this series spans over years! Starting in 2009 I believe. It is so good and so addicting, I just had to share to get you all in on it right away!

There are a couple of “drawbacks” to this series that I feel I must share but understand I share these with you but do not personally feel like it makes this series any less unique and amazing.

First: It is a shot in a “found footage” format. The “entries” can be dizzying at times, but for me it adds something, something frightening.

Second: The acting, all be it not Oscar worthy, let us remember that these are not professionals. Here at Horror Aficionados we also have made movies and the same may be said about our films. It is the passion and creativity that makes these independents their charm, so don’t judge to hard, everybody starts from somewhere. Also as the series moves forward the acting gets worlds better.

Third: If you are a Gorehound like my love, well, Gorehound, you may find this series slightly disappointing in that it has no real gore. Yes there is blood, but it’s not truck loads.

Forth: You do have to jump back and forth from Marble Hornets and Totheark all while paying attention to the dates. This can be a tad bit daunting, but for me totally worth it.

Neither here nor there this series is amazing and I and I can’t wait to watch it unfold! I may be very vague here but I just wouldn’t sleep well in my coffin tonight knowing that I gave away all the sweet delicious secrets. Please watch this series.

Til next time, stay haunted ghoulies!

-Ashely Sinderella

The Devil’s Due (2014) -review by the Director.

 

The Gist:

Zach is in love with Sam. They’re soon to be wed, those little love birds. Zach is a sycophant codependent. Every move Sam makes he is there with his video camera.

Zach and Sam will have no need for long term memory because Zach is literally recording everything they do. In fact that is how we watch the ‘Devil’s Due’ through video cameras.

OBGYN:

When you are on vacation, lets say your honey moon and you are drunk and tired. It’s your last night of your vacation. You just want to get home to your hotel, have sex one more time and get some sleep before you catch a plane in the a.m. Don’t, and I mean don’t, go with some ostentatious cab driver hyper-pressuring you to go to this wild party only the locals know about.

Because you might drink to much tequila and end up put in a room that acts as gateway to hell. In this room you might get boned by the devil and subsequently get pregnant with his hybrid love child. This is exactly what happened to Zach and Samantha. Her slit was filled with satanic seed.

 The palm reader knew where this was going.

Through the hand held and surveillance camares we watch Samantha come to term.

Being pregnant with demon sperm effects a girl. Sam is a vegetarian and she eats raw meat in the grocery store. She has some type of super power, while eating deer in the woulds she kills some kids by throwing them violently into the air. 

          Get away you nosey fuckers!

Zach is realizing something is wrong. He, very slowly and far too late, uncovers the whole thing is a satanic plot. 

Devil’s Due isn’t an exact remake though it does follow closely the basic plot of Rosemary’s Baby except you see the movie more through the husband’s perspective rather than the mother’s, a subtle deviation from Roman Polanski’s film.

Acting:

I thought the acting was good.

 A lot of Sam lying around is exciting to watch.

Gore:

Some mutilated deer, a post caesarian section which isn’t very gory (nothing like Inside), some blood spitting, a huge needle going stuck in Sam’s belly bump, one decent boo-scare, some death by devil jedi force power.

Sex:

No nudity, no devil fucking, it’s only implied. Sam in a bikini, some clothed butt shots by her codependent hubby.

Something like this would have made the movie a lot better!

Directing:

Good job, telling a whole story with a video camera, that can’t be easy. Remarkable sound quality for watching something recorded with a surveillance camera, a hand held video cam, and a spy cam.

 Aww Satan junior is kicking, hard. 

Due Date: 

Before I say anything too critical I want to say I do like movies shot like this. Shot like Paranormal Activity, Blair Witch, Cannibal Holocaust. They create tension and realism. I think making a movie like this, with ‘an actor using a video camera’ ( I say that because in reality the actor is not really recording, the film crew is. It just looks like the actor is doing it.), is brave and takes talent to tell the story.

I love horror movies, this is a horror movie, and it’s not that bad.

 Don’t mess with a girl make a gateway to hell.

But that being said it’s not a movie you should go see at the theater, buy the DVD, or even rent at red box. It’s a film you might check out when you have a world class hangover, are suck home while your friends are out snowboarding, and it happens to be on cable. 

The story is predictable as hell. The movie lacks punch, gore, sex, sometimes it’s down right boring. How do you make a movie about being pregnant with Satan’s baby and it is boring? Somehow Devil’s Due accomplished this. A big plot hole is why doesn’t Zach watch all this footage he has taken? You could have found some clues there buddy.

The Symbol used in the movie the C with two dashes is explained to be a cult symbol for 1 John 2:18 about the anti-christ. While that is explained by the priest. We get no further details. Why or from where this symbol comes from is never explained. Is it really from a satanic cult or is it a symbol the writer (Lindsay Devlin) just arbitrary used because she thought it looked cool?

On a purely personal note, the part that really upsets me, and this is even true of a good devil baby movie like Rosemary’s Baby, is that in the end, the devil worshipers get their antichrist and the movie ends! We never get to see what happens. I just invested 90 minutes watching a 9 month occult pregnancy and I don’t get to see what shenanigans Satan junior get’s into. All I saw in Devil’s Due was that Demon’s Son’s head glows orange. I won’t spoil who lives or dies if you still want to see what Zach has on his SD card.

Unfortunately, in conclusion  I’m going to have to give this one a thumbs down. I hate to do it. I really wanted to like this one, but it just wasn’t satisfying enough.

This is the look on my face at the end of the movie too!

-The Director.

Jacob’s Ladder (1990) -review by the Director

 

This film came out in 1990. It’s been under the radar for me. I’d heard people say it was good, but enthusiasm sells and no one seemed to love it. One of my fellow aficionados Chris Webb, was the enthusiastic sell. After he told me how much he liked it I found it on Netflix and sat down for a watch.

The first rung:

The movie starts off slow and cautious. Jacob (a young Tim Robbins)  is working as a mailmen. He is living with a co-worker, Jezzy, an attractive emotional and sexual latino girlfriend. Jacob has flash backs to vietman where he was a solider. He was apparently badly wounded in action but survives. He also has flash backs to his first marriage. His marriage evidently disintegrated after the death of his young son Gabe (a young Macauly Culkin) who’s death he feels somewhat responsible for, though he was hit by a car.

Down the Ladder:

This is a cerebral thriller. As the movie unfolds it becomes harder and harder to distinguish which reality is the one Jacob lives in. Is he dreaming while in Vietnam, living with Jezzy, still married and dreaming.

There is a steady dread overwhelming to the film. Jacob feels he being followed by demons. He meets up with other me members of his squad in the war. They join with him to expose a government experiment called the LSD ladder, and it goes wrong. Then we aren’t sure if Jacob was even in the war. He is in a mental hospital having tests done on him. Then it’s unclear if he ever survived the war. It’s all a mystery.

Jacob is metaphorically scaling down a ladder into insanity. 

Acting:

Tim Robbins is great and establishes himself as the even greater actor he will become. Danny Aiello plays Jacob’s chiropractor and pseudo psychologist. He has some great lines and all the scenes with him and Jacob are magic. Those seemingly innocuous moments in the movie are the grounding between Jacob and reality. Good stuff.

Gore:

The movie has it’s moments of violent war gore. Some demon special effects and boo-scares.

Sex:

Jezzy get naked several times and they have sex. T & A stuff.

Directing: 

The directing style is grungy and strong. This movie was probably ahead of it’s time. Their are gloomy and bizarre shots that obviously inspired latter film makers. The whole movie has a gritty surreal feel. It’s very slow yet it draws you in. It cries out for a satisfying ending to clear up all this madness.

End of the Ladder:

This movie just moved to slow for me. I couldn’t get into the mind rape. I found myself liking it then wanting it to be over. Though I wanted closure so bad I stuck it out to the end. It’s probably going to have people that like it, and maybe love it. It’s a quality movie and I hate to say it’s bad. I just didn’t dig it. You might, but you will have to decide if this is your kind of movie and take a chance.

-The Director.

Maniac (2012) -review by Chea

 

Franck Khalfoun’s remake of the 1980s original,

2012 Maniac is shot in first person with gore and nudity.

A third generations mannequin restoration shop owner Frank (Elijah Wood) is a delusional cereal killer with serious mother issues.

Suffering from chronic migraines, and manic depression he has ravenous blood lust episodes of stalking and uncontrollably killing women which he then scalps.

He staples the hair to his mannequins who, he hallucinates, to be alive and antagonizing him.

He becomes obsessed with a French photographer named Anna who photographs mannequins for an art exhibit.

You can guess how that pans out.

This movie is very visual and whimsical with many dream sequences and flashbacks of him as a child watching his mother and her string of men and drug abuse.

I give it 4 stars. I think it’s much better than the original and really takes you down the path of a maniac. Through their eyes. It has a great soundtrack as well. 

-Chae

Haute Tension (High Tension) Aficionado Review

Friend Marie and Alex are on vacation. They arrive at Alex’s parents house to chillax. Marie, the hot chick with a boy’s hair cut, listens to music and masturbates, very nice.

A menacing truck driver killer is the movie’s psychopath. He engages in violent murders and eventually chases the young girls. The ‘high tension’ comes as the girl’s fight for their lives.

The movie doesn’t disappoint with some blood soaked gore.

A Concrete saw, one of Marie’s weapons of choice. 

There is a very whacked twist in the third act. It was our consensus that this was good and bad. We were kind of divided on the twist, some liked it, some not so much. Personally I wasn’t really engaged with Marie and Alex to care by the 60 minute mark.  Ultimately we think this is a horror film worth watching, but don’t go out of your way to see it. Over all most horror fans like it. I can’t imagine it’s anyone’s favorite or in their top 20.

If you like twists, lesbian overtones, and whacked gore including a blow job with a severed head then check it out…

-The Director

The french duo director Alexandre Aja and writer Gregory Levasseur of this flick, later brought us the awesome Hills Have Eyes remake. I highly recommend you see their revision of Hills.

I spit on Your Grave (2010)

 I spit on your grave (2010)

(Disclaimer) It’s hard not to compare this to the original but I shall try to review it on it’s own. Comparing remakes to the original is tired and cliche in my opinion, but that is only my opinion and I’ll keep it to myself.

Hock: 

Successful writer (I say successful since she has a fucking book published. Do you comprehend how inconceivable that is to accomplish in today’s writers market?).

Jennifer Wells (Sara Butler) rents an isolated cabin to work on her second novel for a couple of months. Some completely amoral psychopaths make her acquaintance at a gas station. Jennifer is lost. Country stud and scary as fuck Jonny Miller (Jeff Branson) points her in the right direction. Jonny flirts and gets rejected, burn.

And now spit: 

Jennifer finds her spacious cabin on the river. She drinks wine, sun baths, smokes poke, and oh yeah works on her book. Being a writer is fucking hard ass work. Nothing like it is in the movies, at least not this movie. This movie has nothing to do with writing. It has to do with sadism and revenge on the grandest scale. So how does it go there?

The fat pervert of the maniacal foursome has himself a video camera and he has been peeping and recording Jennifer.

Matthew the retard of the group has also been to Jennifer’s house and fixed her sink and toilet. Jennifer is so overjoyed she spontaneously kisses Matthew on the cheek. After which he bolts out without getting paid.

The four creeps decide Matthew is lying there is no way a hot city girl like her kisses a buffoon like Matthew. Enamored by the smoking hot bod on the video recording the boys decide to pay Jennifer a visit. I won’t go into detail. They torture and exploit her. She escapes and things only get worse. Jennifer is violently raped by everyone. She is raped up the ass and it ain’t pretty. This is a brutal exploitation movie, not a ‘date movie.’

After the horror she endures Jennifer wanders around naked while the sadists follow and makes jokes. Before her rapists and violators have a chance to blow her head off she falls off a bridge. The Sociopaths are worried. They can’t find her body. After a month, things get strange.

Jennifer isn’t dead and she is a cold hearted bitch scorned. She one by one exacts revenge in the most creative yet horrifying ways on her attackers. She sneaks around, none of them know what is coming until it’s too late. She is merciless, just as they were with her. She spits on their graves.

GORE: 

The movie is chock full of gore. It’s drawn out torturous gore. Not like a splatter fest but every bit as violent. I’m seasoned and some of the kils made me twitch. Gorehouds will feel like it was time well spent after watching this one.

SEX:

The is a fair amount of nudity. Sara Butler shows everything, most of the nudity is her during rapes and her walking around filthy in a state of shock. Unfortunately nothing is sexy or erotic unless to are a sicko sadist and like rape. Ladies get Jeff Branson’s naked butt, but nothing sexy in that scene.

Acting:

I enjoyed Sheriff Storch (Andrew Howard) he played a terrible villain. The best villain are the ones you really hate. This two sided bastard was great.

Sarah Butler played her role pretty believable. She looks awful and really in excruciating pain during the anal rape scene. She looks out of her mind during the aftermath. She plays the scorned revenge bit well.

Drecting/Production:

I personally would have shot the movie more graphic, shown more. There is a lot implied, though it is strongly implied, it could have been a tad more graphic. That being said, there is only so much you can show without it being pornographic. I also thought the nudity was a little scant for this type of movie.
I did like that the movie looked didn’t show off it’s budget. It looked simple. That made it seem more tense. The director never let up. It was always tense. There is always a sense of loathing throughout the film. Some of this was accomplished with subtle ambient music or none at all.

Final Rating:

I couldn’t find this movie to be about anything except exploitation on a grand scale and revenge on a grander scale. The revenge kills are the highlight of the movie. I want to stress that again, the revenge kills are brutal and tough to watch! They are the main reason to watch this exploitation film smutt. 

I never felt attached to any of these people. I did feel I experienced the movie cerebrally and it was extremely unsettling. It’s a true horror movie. Maybe you could coin it torture porn.  Yes, it has some plot holes. How did Jennifer survive a month with next to nothing? None of that is explained. How was she able to get the jump on all these seasoned country boys who knew these woods? I suppose the element of surprise. They think they see a ghost when they see her.

Bottom-line, I don’t know how you could see this movie for anything else than what it is. The type of movie you cringe through and feel like taking a shower after or have hot sex then take a shower.

So how do I rate it? How the hell do I not think about the original when I rate it?

-The Death Director.

   

Breathing Room reviewed by Drunk Rant

Breathing Room

The question of how humans will react in extreme situation of life and death will always be of interest.

The situation is: you awake with no memory of how you got to a room with 13 strangers. It is generally understood that you will embark on a game where the winner lives and the losers die. Clues to help you survive are slowly givin to you. You can’t trust anyone.

The truth is we can all identify with one of the 13. We all react to things in a way that would be similar to how the 13 reacted. How would you handle the situation?
Some of us are leaders, and will always try seek answers.
Some are followers.
Some are independant. Always questioning even the reasonable.
Some are liars. Seeking their own advantage.
Some are what I will label folders. Not even able to cope with the preasure.

What is strange is the idea of who we would want to be vs. who we really are. I think that no one wants to be weak. No one wants to be a liar. But yet, we are. There always is a weak person and a liar. There is always a selfish person and there is alway a leader. You may never really know who you are unless you are put to the test.

There is no escaping the fact that Breathing Room is a version of the SAW movies. And while SAW is one of the greats, Breathing room does have its own ending. Just don’t expect it to match any kind of SAW greatness.

I ask you this: Are we already in a room fighting for our own survival? Has someone already givin us clues and just watching to see how it all unfolds?

The drink of choice for this is everclear from the bottle.

-Drunk Rant

A Serbian Film reviewed by your Director

         

Premise:

Ex-porn legend Milosh from beautiful Serbia is lured back into the biz for an enormous some of whatever Serbians call dollars, Dinars according to the all wise internet. I don’t know the amount but I’m thinking it’s millions. He won’t do child porn, he is assured its something much more special and it’s a revolutionary porn genre so there has to be plenty of secrecy about what they are doing. After a couple Jack Daniels Milosh and his smoking hot wife (she looks just like Jean Grey from X-Men) go for the money, a fat check of Serbian dinars.

The Big Picture:

A Serbian Film has always been precious to me because I got to see a bootleg copy from Synapse Films about a year before it was release in the USA. I didn’t even think it would get an American release. There are two critical scenes cut from the US version. I was greatly disturbed because of this. Those two scene are two of the most horrific in the movie. One can still caliginously discern what is going on in those scenes. I think with those two scenes cut, the film can’t be fully taken to a superlative hight of traumatic repugnance.

Milosh begins showing up for his scenes in this secretive porno. The charismatic Director speaks to him through a receiver stuck in his ear. Milosh is directed what to do. Milsoh finds the scenes bizarre, though he is always pretty drunk and drugged. Fuck it he whats that massive pay off. The money will set him, his wife, and son up for the rest of their Serbian lives. Milosh, endearing legendary porn star and family provider. Isn’t it admirable to see a man with his priorities in order. On a side note when Milosh catches his young son of about 8 or 9 watching a porno video featuring the boy’s father plowing the hell out of some blonde bimbo on a motor cycle, he takes the time to illustrate sex and masturbation. It’s the most bizarre illustration of adolescent sexual maturation I have ever heard.

Getting back to making the new porno genre, Milosh has seen no script so he really doesn’t understand what is going on. He continues to drink Jack Daniels like water. His perception becomes more warped. He becomes more easily manipulated by the Director. He is later given cow viagra, that little trick makes him an enraged sex machine with a foot long cock that could hammer nails into wood.

He finds himself in several scenes with a young girl present. She looks about twelve dressed as Alice in Wonderland. The film becomes increasingly taboo.  Milosh has second thoughts and want’s out but it’s to late. He jumps out a window. No matter, he is sucked into making more ‘Art’ as the Directer likes to shout over and over.

I won’t say too much about the movie because I don’t want to spoil the experience. It keeps pushing your threshold. After about 25 minutes into the movie you are quite hooked, you are no longer just watching, now you are experiencing A Serbian Film. Hold on tight, knuckles white as roasted turkey breast, A Serbian FIlm just keeps getting better.

Acting:

Milosh performs his heart out. He fully embraces his role and is totally believable. All the acting is on target. I especially loved the charismatic Director. Your eyes are glued to him every time he is on screen. I never felt the acting ruined any scenes.

Gore:  

We are treated to a few mucho grizzly scenes. A decapitation, a live skull fuck, and some gut churring rapes. There is a totally sick scene you will miss in the American cut, if you get an uncircumcised version look out.

SEX: 

This bitch is full of it. Softcore sex, necrophilia, anal, masturbation, cumshots, and off screen vaginal mutilation. Bouncing big boobs, full frontal male and female nudity. Last be NOT least Milosh’s huge cock hanging down to mid-thigh and fully erect pointing at the camera dripping in blood. I could do chin ups on that monster if I could do chins ups anymore. Vicious ass rape and fresh corpse fucking I’ll emphasize again.

Final Rating: 

A Serbian Film is an especially evil horror movie. It’s one of those sadistic movies you need a shower after watching. Even after the shower you still feel dirty, like your soul is polluted. It’s like after you eat a super sized value meal at McDonalds. That sick feeling you feel after, like why the fuck did I just do that to myself?

The movie has a great plot. At times scenes may seem random but fear not gorehounds, everything ties together in the end. You may need to contemplate and wrap your noggin around what you just witnessed.

Superb movie, brutal ending, well acted, lots of raunchy sex and Milosh’s endlessly consuming Jack Daniels night and day. A Serbian Film is original and shockingly taboo.

The movie is in Serbian, not dubbed into english, so you will have to read the dialogue. The speaking scenes are not so rapid fire that reading is a chore. I preferred hearing the actors real voices anyway.

 -The Death Director